~ The Further Adventures Of Robert Sean Friedman ~: Back in The USA!

The Big 3

My father died in 1998. My brother, our mother & myself have referred to our little tripod as the Big 3 ever since. Todd and I never had kids so the circle never grew, nor was it diluted. My immediate family core is quite small. Therefore, when we are together, it’s focused and precious. It’s not like most Christmas’ where the boys fly in from different coasts of the same country and stay for a week with their spouses and children. Our reunion dynamic is a bit off the norm I would imagine. Todd lives in Tokyo and has for 23 years. We bunk at The Momma’s – Good Ol’ Birdy Mae, for a full month. The first couple days revolve around storytelling and jet lag punctuated by the treasures we bring home as we unpack. On day 3 the repair list is produced. That sweet handwriting is a little looser than it was when she wrote notes and hid them in my sack lunch as a kid, but I know it by heart. The list is scant and thin. She’s too proud to ask for any real help. We scour the house and add as we see an opportunity for improvement. Then the plans for tackling the list are drawn up.

My kid brother has the best hair. No gray and thick as can be.

The Cocoa Bear makes it to America !!

Ryan and Giselle. That stud sailed out of San Diego with me 20 years ago on the big adventure

My buddy Colin (the other stud who sailed off with us 20 years ago) drafted these

My brother and I built them

By day 4 we’ve eaten her cupboards bare. Finally, we get to go to Costco. I think every American who lives abroad delights in the Costco trip. Hers is next to an In-N-Out hamburger joint. Another American homesick soft spot. From the mega store I buy a full filet mignon and what doesn’t get cut into 2-inch steaks and perfectly cooked by me, gets diced into tiny little pieces and cooked in a giant crockpot of homemade chili (me again). This is ritual as we eat it on the couch while sucking down west coast IPAs and watching real American grid iron football. If I didn’t spend so many years out of the USA, I wouldn’t cherish these simplistic comforts so intensely.

The yearnings are finally satiated by the end of the first week when I have gorged myself on hot buffalo wings from Long Wongs and the Italian sando from Jersey Mike’s, as well as every Reuben sando I can unhinge my jaw for and shove in my mouth. As for my Mexican food cravings – they start immediately and never end and nothing ever diminishes them. I’m writing this at 9 am in Italy which arguably has the world’s most popular food and I’m still craving chilaquiles for breakfast.

Went down to Mexico to get an MRI

We also drank Bohemia and ate pollo con mole. I no longer order tostadas because it’s obvious they went straight to the contractor and skipped the architect. There is very little structural integrity and it’s a certain mess waiting to happen. I love the ingredients but much prefer them in an enchilada. “I want my delicious wrapped up senor!”

I thought I had torn a rotator cuff in my shoulder and was probably facing a miserable surgery. Nope – just some odd impingement and 2 weeks of NSAID did the trick.

That’s as high as I could comfortably lift my arm. All better now.

Lake Havasu

I’ve got a friend named Mark Sessions who I credit for kickstarting my wanderlust. We were 19 and drove a motorcycle around the western states one summer. He’s now retired and travels around with his wife Pan and we stayed with them for a week in a big house he rented. Fun stuff and I always enjoy his company. We’ve been friends since we were 12.

They are exactly the same height. These girls could be sisters from behind

Quartzsite

Linda and Stephen are friends that coached us through the “buying a moho in Europe” strategy. They now live in a moho in the USA after 5 years driving around Europe. We stopped to see them in Quartzsite. After having shared campsites in Edinburgh and Lisbon this was a bit rustic but the lunch and company were grand.

S’Mish

This is my loving nickname for South Mission Beach AKA: The Beat Down Beach Town - The Billion Dollar Ghetto - San Diego’s Biggest Cul de Sac. My buddy Todd married Elyce Reck. Her family is as close as S’Mish gets to royalty. Her grandparents were one of the original inhabitants and she’s had uncles and cousins living here ever since. Her uncle Bob owns a building on the beach side and he keeps one of the furnished apartments open for friends and family. I was deeply grateful to barely qualify. We moved in for almost a month since I sold my own house down the street in Nov 2019.

Back To My Beach Life

The daily boardwalk bike rides cleared my head and that clean sea air revitalized my lungs. It took about 1 day and I was ready to move back. It took about 20 days to remember why I left: It is so expensive and crowded. Even though we had a blast and it’s one of the most wonderful places, even paradise can become a rut. Plus, that third stool from the door at the Beachcomber will still be there in 20 years when I can no longer adventure. I think S’Mish can wait.

We pretty much did everything with these 2. They were so generous with their time.
Thanks again Todd & Elyce!

Todd is a working man but made time to join for fun whenever he could. It’s pretty hard to beat San Diego when combining ebikes with craft breweries. We buzzed around and sampled all the wonderful ales we could onboard. And of course, there were also the regular drinks at the Combover, The Pennant & Luigi’s with the usual suspects. Mondays were spent with DJ Birney at World Famous. In the 10 years I’ve been gone it’s nice that there are a few places and friends that still remain.

My friend, the famous DJ

Jon Von Rodley took us out for a fun day on the water

Got Engaged

It simply was no longer enough to introduce Alejandra as my girlfriend. It just didn’t convey the depth of feeling I have for her. That’s it in a nutshell. Since I don’t want kids, I could never find a reason to get married. I finally found one. Maybe love can be that simple.

Matthew

This big hairy American has been a pal for almost 25 years. We stayed a week at his house in Rancho Bernardo, ate delicious food, tackled a yard project and gave Aleja an American gun experience. He recently retired. I think he’ll be very successful in his new phase.

You must remember - Guitar riffs are not native to Latin music but in spite of that I think she has the heavy metal overbite perfected along with those grimaces.

First version of the backyard bad idea.

The finished version

My Rock Star Cousin

Brina is married to Gus and together they make up half of the Exploits. I was lucky enough to catch them in Encinitas. Look at them - They rock! I’m so proud! I told anyone who accidentally made eye contact with me:

“That’s my cousin! She’s my cousin, and that’s her husband Gus!”

“Yeah dude, I heard you when you told my girlfriend a minute ago.”

“Un huh – first cousins. Our dads are brothers.”

My North County SD Family

Phoenix Again

We rented a car and drove back to Phoenix to see The Momma and my brother again for a final week. Last chance for American delicacies, bro hugs, and kissing on those sweet momma cheeks.

Checking Every Box

The year has started out with a series of huge wins. Aleja got her USA visa and came for 2 months. She finally met my mom in person and everyone else. When asked if she would hitch her wagon to my donkey - she said yes! I didn’t need shoulder surgery and I can still barely afford America. I count these 90 days in the USA as a total victory.